Thursday 11 April 2013

Dreams. And standing in the way.



Just don't go waiting for your dreams.

I was 15 when I heard those words. I was babysitting, keeping an eye on the toddler playing at my  feet while reading my english school book. Her mum was running around grabbing bits and pieces before she rushed out the door to an important dinner.

It was while rattling off the list of before-bedtime things to do, pointing to where this and that was, that she paused to ask... "What is it you want to do?"

"What do I want to do?"

"Yes. When you grow up..."

"Oh right. I'm going to be a writer. Study journalism. Write a book. And travel the world."

Said just like that. Because nothing was going to get in my way, and my priorities would never change, and time would never been an issue. Or so I thought.

She smiled. "Do that. Do it all. You will. I had dreams once."
 
"Once? What did you dream of?"

"Oh it's nothing. Too late now. Just don't go waiting for your dreams, or it might get too late..."

She returned to her list. "And the nappies are here, but she should be fine now. And we'll be back at 10.30, and help yourself to coffee/tea. The biscuits are here..."

"But why is it too late? If it's your dream, it can't be too late..."

"Oh other people are doing it now. Not when I dreamt it up. But now other people have shops like I was going to have... "

"But it can't be too late... Are you sure?" I persisted. If it was her dream. It could never be too late...

She smiled, a knowing smile. As if one day I too would understand.

"I have a child now. Things have changed. It was just a silly little dream..."

Later that night I sat down in the quiet of the house, a little girl sound asleep. I stirred my coffee gently, I looked out into the dark of the night and I wondered.

I wondered if it really was too late for her dream. I never wanted it to be too late for mine.

And so I made a promise to myself that I would never cut my time short. Never put a limit on my dreams, give them a schedule or believe in their failure. I made a promise to keep on dreaming with my whole heart no matter what. At fifteen.

I see now what her look meant. How easy it is to throw dreams away, to cut them down, to scrap them because time and life and my to-do list and sense of responsibility just got too full.

And I see that in a sense I've been doing that. A little. Going against my promise in part. You see there's a little book I've been dreaming up and writing in my head. But excuses {and fear} have seen me stop when it comes to putting pen to paper... and truly beginning.

After writing my last post, this memory bubbled it's way to the surface. And it has set me on my proper path again. A path that's not limited by time. One that allows dreams to manifest. The path my heart chooses.

xx
 
~ You can read last week's post Can't help but dream here.

Do you let your dreams manifest? And do you believe in can ever be too late for your dreams? x

10 comments:

  1. It is never too late for dreams...ever. And it is never to late to start dreaming if you have stopped. At least that is what I believe.

    My dreams have changed over the years, as I have aged and as my journey has taken different twists and turns. With each new dream I jump in full force and go for it. They are not always perfectly executed but I gave them a shot and don't look back with regret on any of it. Each dream brought to reality has brought me to the place I am at today and I love that place.

    I do hope you put pen to paper, let your dreams become a reality.

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    1. Oh Kim, what a wonderful way to live your life.

      cheers Kate

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  2. Keep dreaming Elisa...I loved that last post and its stayed with me...so much so that I'm starting hockey again this week...just one of my little dreams!
    I hope you write the book...I would love to read it.
    x

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  3. I've been wondering about my own dreams lately too, Elisa, sometimes it is so hard to feel they are possible. Dream with your whole heart and write with it too - if the writing you have planned is as beautiful as what you write here, the world needs it. xx

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  4. Elisa, it's NEVER too late for your dreams. At the moment you have young children. Maybe you can find some time here and there or blocks of time to pursue your dreams or you may decide to wait a while until your girls are older and you have more time to yourself. Only YOU can decide what is right for YOU and YOUR family, search your heart and you will work it out. Whatever you decide though, it's never too late for your dreams. Wishing you all the best. xxoo

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  5. Oh this brings so many emotions to the surface Elisa. Please, never forget your dreams. It is one of my biggest regrets. At least I feel I am making amends now that I am writing. Sometimes dreams need to be changed a little but really it's never too late. Beautiful post. x

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  6. What a fantastic post Elisa. I love that you shared that experience from your teens... and it obviously has had a profound impact on you too. I can completely relate to what you're saying here, as I have had many dreams, some of which I've recognised, others which still remain unfulfilled. But one thing is for sure, we all have to keep striving to turn our dreams into reality. Sounds like you are pursuing a pretty exciting one of your dreams now, good on you xo

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  7. Reading this beautiful blog and the great comments, a line of a Christmas Carol came to mind - "the hopes and fears of all the years are met in thee tonight"!! Keep your dreams alive! <3

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  8. Dreams are so beautiful and messy and wonderful and complicated, but we must keep having them. I feel in a similar place. Enjoy putting pen to paper and making those dreams come true.

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  9. Your words always seem to resonate with me, having dreams are so important. I think I am too a little guilty of putting those dreams aside or not taking the time to think deeply as to what I want. May the dreams you dream come true, a book written by you would be amazing I just know it. xx

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Thank you for your words and support. I'm so glad you stopped by xx